Flawed Line of Defense

The world is a massive, frightening, social experiment…
No rules to follow,
No set path to walk,
No quests to work towards completion.

Just a vast array of choices.

And so many tell you to
Guard yourself.
Build up defenses,
Don’t just let people into your life…

But what they don’t mention
Is how difficult it is
To take down your defenses
Once you’ve built them.

I’ve got a wall built
Around my mind,
Around my heart…
And it’s 50 feet high
10 feet thick
With barbed wire
And one gate
That puts Mordor to shame.

I’ve got all this…
And I don’t know how to let him in.
To show the vulnerabilities,
The anxiety,
The crazy parts that I talk about
But never seem to exhibit.

As he stands on one side,
Shut out,
Hoping to be let in…
I’m on the other;
Nails broken
And fingers bleeding
From clawing at the wall.

With a gate that’s
Rusted shut from all the tears
And no firepower to speak of
I cannot fathom
How I’ll be able to
Let him inside.

And I do
Want to let him in…

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